Social media is the sweet ‘n salty of technology, and I’m absolutely okay with that. It’s the caloric and sugar cane intake that I have to watch. No, I don’t count calories. Portion control? Yes, that’s more like it.
Extremes are fatal either way. If you want to live off the
grid and go all George Orwell 1984 on us, then more power to you, but I think
I’m just going to cut back and be realistic.
But here’s six signs you, er I, may need to consider pulling
the power plug and intentionally allowing the battery to die once in awhile.
1. You’re on Your Mobile Device During a Live-Event
You’re at a concert but are catching it behind your 3.5-inch
screen. Or maybe you and your friends are out for supper, and your heads are
bowed in reverence…to wait, what...Yelp? Instagram? Fandango? Minecraft?
Confession: My life is pretty mundane, but the few times I
hashed out my #livetweet I missed out the good, gritty content and guess what. I misquoted. Everyone else, millions, where tweeting that same message. What’s one
more? Moreover there are the times I missed out on the real-time conversations
around me because I had to check the virtual comments.
2. You’re All About Numbers and Not the Names
You collect virtual people and care more about how many Facebook friends you have and
only know Twitter followers by their handles. Did you know that LinkedIn has
more security than Facebook?
Confession: I took a break from Facebook for awhile because it
fed my ego more than Ensure fed my intestines could. Also, my posts were not
that interesting, despite how hilarious I thought, um think, I am.
3. You Use Your Phone as Your Swiss Army, E-reader Alarm Clock
Remember the days when the Swiss Army Knife was the
all-in-one tool? Now you struggle to turn your phone off at night for fear you
will miss out on an important message, will be unable to read from a print edition
book or hear a traditional alarm.
Confession: I used to work at a Verizon retail store when
Android first launched their smartphones. I had what I thought was a great idea
to sell more phones: I took an acrylic display box and went on an eBay-shopping
spree, buying an internally broken digital camera, keyboard, Kindle, mp3 player
and flashlight. I threw in a couple of games: a deck of cards, scrabble, etc.
and a few other gadgets. Ah, and then the crowning glory. Atop the lid I placed
a sleek, new demo phone showcasing how everything in that box was in that
phone.
Unfortunately, I’ve taken that a bit too literal. I have the
world in my hands, on the go in my pocket that I can always be in the know.
Thank you dear WebMD and Wikipedia.
4. Thunder ONLY Threatens You for Fear of Losing Internet Connection
You dim the light on your phone and hoard it like it’s
December 31st 1999. You perspire at the thought of not being able to Pin.
Confession: My life’s in my Mac. I like to say I’m married to
it, to Him. One time when there was a terrible storm I woke up abruptly and
within 2 seconds jumped up from bed like a mummy, unplugging my laptop from a
non-surge protectant plug.
The next day I informed my family that one day I would make
a great mom; should ever there be an event where I would have to save my kids
first, I would do so. (They didn’t agree.)
5. You’re a “Workaholic”
(When you just love having an excuse to check your emails
and have them synced.) There is a certain thrill when a notification sound
comes through your purse or pocket.
Confession: On a day off I felt I missed too many emails –both
personal and professional - in 24 hours so I set my notification to push
messages, vibrate, blink and ping with an almost obnoxious notification
ringtone. I successfully managed to respond to every message.
6. Everything Online Seems Pinteresting
Your browser bar has a widget, your phone has an app and you
know how to upload a picture from your computer: you are a Pinterest ninja, and
no one knows your likes, pins, boards and re-pins better than you.
Confession: I pin a lot. I say it’s therapeutic. Ipso facto,
the sixth sign I might be a social media addict.
